When you're in a meeting with other people, be with them, not with your laptop.



## Respect for Others

If you care about the person who's speaking in a meeting, you'll look at them.  You'll be with them.  You'll engage.  

If you have your laptop open in a meeting, you're communicating that something else is more important than the meeting.  You're communicating to others that observe your stance that the content, purpose, or outcome of that meeting is not as important as something else you've got going on privately on the screen of your computer.  It's super easy to be distracted by a screen in a meeting, and it's super important to give others the respect of your attention when in their presence.

## Laptops Integral to a Meeting

A meeting is not usually convened for the purpose of having you be on your laptop during it.  But sometimes meetings are working meetings.  Perhaps a spreadsheet is referenced.  Perhaps people are taking turns sharing their screen to a video conference screen.  There's a moment when using your laptop is required, so you have it handy.  Use it.  Be empowered by that tool to make the meeting better.  Then close it.

If you don't want to shut down you computer for some reason, like for keeping a video conference session open, close the lid most of the way in order to make it clear that your attention is on the meeting and the people in the meeting.

## I'm Bored

If you're bored, either try to fully engage or leave.  If the meeting doesn't need you, leave.  If there are too many people in the meeting for you to effectively participate, leave.  The more unengaged people there are in a meeting, the less helpful the meeting will be.  Be gracious, but get up and go.

## I'll Just Listen In

Sometimes we'll attend a meeting thinking we just want to hear what's going on.  We might -- _might_ -- hear something useful.  We don't expect it's very probable, but just in case, we'll attend that recurring meeting one more time.  

This is a losing bet.  If you can't fully engage, don't go.  If you just want to hear what's going on, it would be better to hear it over a video conference stream than to go sit in the middle of the meeting half zoned-out.  Make sure you turn off your video so people don't take cues from your non-interest as displayed on the big conference room screen.  

Multitasking doesn't work anyway.  You only end up doing two things less than or equal to half as well anyway.  Skip the meeting.  Ask a trusted attendee for the 5 minute highlight version.

Close your laptop and go to the meeting -- or don't.  Either choice is great.

Is this a challenge for you?  What am I saying?  The pull of the screen is a challenge for the Internet-connected human kind.  How are you going to decide whether to skip or engage in your next meeting?

When you're in a meeting with other people, be with them, not with your laptop.

Close Your Laptop

I have traditionally been a big holiday coder.  I've had a ton of fun projects start or finish on vacation.  It's a great time for these projects.  But what might we be missing on vacation if we're always coding?



## Waiting for This Moment

You've had an idea in your head.  It's been percolating for a while now as life has continued on in its usual way.  Your time has been filled with other things, some good or bad, essential or yawn-worthy. But no more -- now you're on vacation.  There's a national holiday and you've taken an extra day or two around it.  This will be a perfect time to start coding what has been just an idea into existence.

## Coding with Headphones

Now you're sitting in the living room at a relative's home, headphones donned.  And trends being as they are, they probably look like giant speakers tied to the sides of your head.  Across from you, on the other couch are members of your family.  You haven't seen them in a while.  You've all gotten together for this occasion because of the shared holiday.  What's happening around you?  What are you missing inside of your headphones?

## Quiet Time

There is something therapeutic about coding.  You sit silently, absorbed in a problem.  You make something out of nothing, and your idea comes to life.  For the combo creative and introvert, it's a great pasttime.  We need that alone time to recharge.  So, yes, vacation time is a good time for coding.  There is also value in building relationships with those around you.

## In The Same Room

As you code with your headphones on, who's across the room from you, sitting on the couch?  Your gathered family might be there.  Your long-unseen friends might be there.  Your children might be there.  Your spouse might be there.  Like developing projects, vacations are a great time to develop relationships.  These are real people.  They are a real major part of our lives.  They have much more inherent value than our projects and ideas.  We will be much more satisfied in our successful relationship development than we will with our software development.

## Finding Time

If vacations provide special circumstances to be with people with whom we value relationships, where will the time come from to start and finish our coding project?  Try 5am.  On a regular day in a regular week, no one will mind if you code your project at 5am.  And you won't feel like you're missing out on anything -- the world's asleep.  5am on vacation is similarly available.

## Collaborative Coding

Another way to work on your ideas and to build relationships simultaneously is to involve other people in your projects.  Or get someone to code *with* you.  Make something that you and your friend or relative are interested in using together.  Or engage someone with complementary skills who can help your project be better in other ways.

When do you find your time to code?  Do you code on vacation?  How does it make you feel when you code while people are around and with you?  How will you adjust any of your practices to make vacations more valuable?

Ok, I'm going to stop writing and go talk to someone. :)